By TRACEY SHIPLEY, JUDITH POSNERBored little boy in classroom (illustrative)(photo credit: INGIMAGE)“ADD/ADHD is called a ‘disorder’ for a reason…it ‘dis-orders’ things in one’s life…” – Dr. Gabor MateDo you know people who always seems to be looking for chaos? They are consistently late, disorganized and stressed. Does it seem as though if they don’t find the chaos they are looking for, they actually create it? Does this sound like one of your teens or even you? According to the excellent treatment of this topic in Driven to Distraction by Edward Hallowell and John Ratey, this tendency is a basic feature of attention deficit disorder (ADD/ADHD). In their groundbreaking book, Hallowell and Ratey discuss the troubling issues associated with this syndrome, including a vast range of symptoms such as underperformance at school, difficulties in developing and maintaining relationships, impulsive behaviors, short tempers, difficulty completing tasks and various other problematic behaviors.Contrary to popular belief, ADD is not just about performance in school. It is about life skills and lifestyle in its totality. As these and other prominent writers in the field point out, ADD can even have a direct influence on high-risk behavioral tendencies such as substance abuse and other forms of acting out. As we already know, teens in general sometimes have a natural inclination towards impulsive or risky behaviors, so adding ADD to the mix can be especially dangerous. As parents, it is essential that we familiarize ourselves with the issue.Over the last decades, more and more children, teens and adults have been diagnosed with ADD or ADHD. The former, attention deficit disorder, emphasizes difficulty in focusing and completing tasks. This could be typified by a quiet child who is spacey or dreamy.The latter, attention deficit hyperactive disorder, is associated with the more usual stereotype of an ADD child who bounces off walls, fidgets and has trouble sitting still.Of course, both subsets exist on a continuum. So while teens with extreme cases of the disorder are usually clearly identifiable, those with more minor symptoms may escape diagnosis. ADD/ADHD manifests itself in difficulty focusing in school and after-school activities, as well as problems with taking responsibility at home. Their rooms are a mess and their lives are disorganized; their thoughts tend to wander and race in all directions, making it hard to focus and follow through.These characteristics can interfere with our kids’ motivation to move forward with the basic tasks of everyday life. They may have trouble following rules and frequently find themselves in trouble.Or they become the class clown, trying to deflect attention away from their inability to function like other students.Over the years, many such students have been wrongly placed in slow learning disability classes due to a teacher’s inability to get them to behave in class. This stigma, together with the effects of ADD/ADHD, often sets these teens up for failure, increasingly affecting every aspect of their lives. The constant criticism these behaviors precipitate in us as parents and teachers causes these children to grow up feeling like failures and has a profound effect on their self-esteem – an essential theme that permeates all our columns (see “The Importance of Building Self-Esteem in our Children” at http://www.jerusalemteencounseling.net/article_08.html).There are various opinions on the root causes of ADD, but as Dr. Gabor Mate, author of Scattered: How Attention Deficit Disorder Originates and What You Can Do About It, points out, it’s not only about genetics. Even though biology is an important element, Mate believes that these disorders are also acquired through challenging social and emotional environments. This means that as parents, we can have a significant impact on how the condition manifests itself.
Mate uses a metaphor to describe this process: When a tree in a forest is overshadowed by bigger, stronger trees, it gets neither the space nor the sunlight it needs to develop to its full potential. How often do we observe siblings from the same household who experience their childhoods very differently? What can we do as parents to channel a child’s differentness more effectively? Mate encourages us to shift our paradigm. Though these kids can be challenging, we have to find a way to avoid losing our patience with them, while trying to help them overcome these challenges.Most importantly, we must realize that kids with ADD/ADHD tend to be especially sensitive children. This sensitive nature can cause them to suffer and struggle more than other kids. On the other hand, with the right guidance, they can become the artists, musicians, inventors and CEOs of the next generation. This is where we as parents can make the difference. Will their ADD/ADHD become an impossible obstacle or something that we can help them to channel and even to celebrate? It’s all about attitude.The issue of when to consider medical treatment for these syndromes is becoming increasingly controversial. The rates of diagnosis and drug treatment of ADD in children and teens has vastly increased in recent years. Many professionals argue that too many very young children are being over medicated for a litany of reasons including societal pressures to keep our kids in order and on task and the pressures of Big Pharma. This is a highly complicated issue that would require a lengthy discussion of its own. There is no doubt that stimulant medications such as Ritalin, Adderall and Concerta can have a profound effect on assisting youngsters and adults to focus and concentrate. And for teens who do not respond well to stimulant meds, non-stimulants such as Strattera or tricyclic can also be helpful. But as Mate and others emphasize, while medication is sometimes necessary, it is not the only way to go. Long term use of these medications have their own drawbacks.So parents are required to undertake research and consultations with due diligence. As with most cognitive and emotional issues, medications alone never resolve problems without adjunct therapeutic strategies.Another important issue is finding the right school and mentor, as your child’s educational environment occupies a bulk of his day.Alternative schools can provide a flexible environment that fosters creativity and uniqueness. Whereas not every kid is capable of succeeding at a school like the Jerusalem Democratic School, where each child creates his own agenda and schedule with minimal basic requirements – in many cases creative kids find inspiration in alternative educational settings.The Experimental Schools (batei sefer nisuiim) were created years ago based on the philosophy of principal Dr. Ganit Weinstein, who succeeded in creating an atmosphere conducive to learning for children in a low socioeconomic area in Bat Yam. The school had open pod classrooms, hallways with couches, beanbags, colorfully painted walls, plants and soothing music. Each student was treated as an individual, and the results were astounding. In a school like Weinstein’s, kids who are different can thrive.If the issues raised in this article sound all too familiar, a good way to start looking into the matter is with Internet articles and books, followed by an initial assessment by your family doctor.In addition to the points we have cited it’s crucial to examine the effects of diet, especially with regard to sugar and caffeine intake and the importance of regular physical exercise.Tracey Shipley is an addiction counselor who counsels teens, young adults and parents. She is also the founder of the Sobar alcohol-free live music bar for teens and young adults. jerusalemteencounseling@gmail.com. http:// teencounseling.netai.net.Dr. Judith Posner is a social scientist, writer and researcher. judep@netvision.net.il
