The premise of Lihi Lapid’s new novel On Her Own is not easy to accept. Nina, a teenage runaway in trouble with the mob, wakes up in a Tel Aviv stairwell wearing a torn mini-dress. The older lady who finds her, Carmella, mistakes Nina for her granddaughter Dana, whom she hasn’t seen in years. Nina moves in with Carmella and lives in fear that Carmella’s son Itamar, who lives in the US, will discover the ruse.
Carmella is fighting dementia and is so happy that her beloved granddaughter, who is actually several years younger than Nina, has come to visit her. Carmella has been living in squalor, and Nina works hard to clean up the house and learns to love Carmella. There is even a love interest of the young man who works in the mini-market, who also worries about Carmella.
I didn’t believe that Nina could continue the ruse for more than a day or so. Someone would figure it out – either Carmella would realize that Nina is not Dana; or Itamar, Dana’s father, would discover the deception.
The gripping drama of On Her Own
Carmella is also mourning the loss of her son Uri killed in fighting many years before. Her husband, Itzik, died several years before. As Memorial Day approaches, Carmella worries that she will miss the day, in some of the saddest scenes of the novel. Carmella realizes that she is losing her memory and terribly misses Itamar, who has been living in the US for six years. The scenes with Itamar and Naama, Israeli expats in the US, are very compelling, as they convince themselves they are only in the US temporarily, and one year turns into six years. Each year, Carmella begs Itamar to at least come for Memorial Day, and each year something comes up. Here is Carmella realizing she is losing her memory.
“That painful moment arrives, as it does every morning, reminding her of what will become dimmer later in the day. Itzik isn’t here, and Uri isn’t here, and Itamar isn’t here. And she doesn’t know what hurts more, the one who isn’t here because that was his fate or the one who is happier far away. And how far away he is. The other side of the world. Everyone there is a stranger.”
I found myself quickly invested in the characters: Carmella; Nina; Irina, Nina’s Russian-speaking mother, who is worried sick about her daughter; Itamar; and Eitan, the young man from the mini-mart who falls in love with Nina.
The budding relationship between Nina and Carmella is especially sweet. It starts out as exploitation – Nina needs a place to hide, and she takes advantage of Carmella’s confusion to pretend to be her granddaughter. But Nina grows to care for Carmella.
“She [Nina] wants to get out of this stifling apartment for a while. To buy something sweet. Ice cream or something that will wash away the vileness in her throat and in her soul. Carmella is sitting in her armchair staring at the blank TV screen, and it worries her to see her like that. Carmella is deteriorating too quickly. She needs to get her moving. She’ll give her the laundry to fold. Encourage her to help with the cooking. And go out. Yes, they have to go out. A little ice cream won’t hurt Carmella either.”
I don’t want to give away too many spoilers. Let’s just say that I kept promising myself that I would read only one more chapter and then go back to work, and an hour later I would reluctantly close the book. It is highly readable and well crafted.
Lihi Lapid is a writer and activist for disability rights. She is married to Israeli politician Yair Lapid, currently the leader of the opposition.■
- On Her Own
- Lihi Lapid
- HarperVia, 2024
- 325 pages; $30