This week’s parashah opens with the verses, “Behold, I set before you today a blessing and a curse. The blessing, that you will listen to the commandments of the Lord your God, which I command you today; and the curse, if you will not listen.”
These verses repeat the concept of freedom of choice. A person chooses either the blessing or the curse, between good and bad. However, a careful and literal reading of the verses shows that there is no promise of reward or punishment.
Choosing to follow a certain path is in itself the actual blessing; the curse is not following that path.The Malbim explains this verse: “If you do so, meaning that you listen to God’s commandment, this itself is the blessing.”
How simple it is to write these words, yet how difficult it is to grasp and absorb them: the mere action of doing the correct thing is in itself the blessing. When you choose, you are blessed.
Their Last Day of Reciting Kaddish
Some 1,200 families will soon finish saying the Mourner’s Kaddish for their loved ones who were murdered on Simchat Torah (October 7). The custom is to recite the Kaddish prayer three times daily for eleven months, and that period ends this week. What is the meaning of the words of this prayer, which was recited over and over again this year?
The Kaddish opens with the mourners expressing their desire to glorify and sanctify the magnificent Name of God: “Yitgadal V’Yitkadash Shmei Rabbah!” The words that follow describe a perfect world that has achieved its tikkun (rectification), and beseeching that God’s presence in the world be further magnified: “Blessed and praised, glorified and exalted, extolled and honored, adored and lauded…”
Why are these words recited by the mourner after his loved one has passed away?
Since every human being is created in God's image, when a person passes away, God’s revelation in the world is diminished somewhat. Something holy is now missing from our world. Therefore, we request that the divine light be increased to fill that void. And this year, that void is almost unfathomable.
As this period of Kaddish ends, one bereaved family asked me to thank the public on their behalf. Those who diligently recited Kaddish three times daily were assisted by many volunteers in Israel and throughout the world who agreed to pause in the middle of their day to join a minyan. Kaddish is never recited alone; it requires the presence of at least nine other men. Reciting Kaddish in a minyan sends the mourners a powerful and comforting message: You are not alone.
May we soon see the fulfillment of the closing words of the Kaddish recited by so many brokenhearted people: “He Who makes peace in His heights, may He make peace upon us and upon all Israel, and say: Amen.”
Our Gift to Agam
Last week was the 20th birthday of Agam Berger, who, for the past eleven months, has been held hostage in Gaza by Hamas.
A birthday is a joyous occasion. And as the day our soul was sent down to this world, it’s also a spiritual milestone.Agam’s mother, Merav Berger, reminds us of this; precisely because it’s impossible to celebrate her daughter’s special day with a cake and a party, she asks people to send spiritual gifts that will “pave a path of light and good deeds for Agam.”
I recently spent a Shabbat with the Berger family in Jerusalem, together with other families of hostages and survivors of the Nova festival. The event was sponsored and arranged by the Kesher Yehudi organization. Since then, the participants have remained in touch through a WhatsApp group that they formed called “From Nova to Jerusalem."
Seeing how everyone there celebrated Agam's birthday by taking on various good deeds and mitzvot was heartwarming. At their request, this initiative is continuing all over the Jewish world.
Once again, you can’t help but wonder why you never hear much about the spiritual endeavors that these families have been taking on. We’ve heard from many of these family members that “freeing the captives is not just about negotiating teams and political leaders; we, too, have a responsibility to do our part.”
So, in honor of Agam’s 20th birthday, instead of a conventional present, the Berger family is asking all its brothers and sisters to send a spiritual gift to Agam bat Merav and the rest of the hostages.
Rebuilding the Ruins of Be’eri
Amidst all the sirens and explosions recently, there was also the sound of joy and gladness, kol chatan v’kol kallah, the voice of the groom and the voice of the bride. Making a small but significant piece of history, last Friday saw the first wedding in Kibbutz Be’eri since the attack on October 7.
The groom, Elad Dubnov, and his bride, Mika, had married with a civil ceremony on Oct. 7, 2022. On their first wedding anniversary, they woke up to a nightmare. Mika was absent, but her family was in their safe room, cut off from communication for hours. Only two days later did she learn that her aunt, Galit Meisner, had been murdered by the Hamas terrorists.
On Oct. 8, Elad was called up for reserve duty. Before he left, the couple decided to have a traditional wedding in the Kibbutz Be’eri synagogue. “I always wanted a traditional Jewish wedding, and now Mika had come around,” Elad said.
Rabbi Yitzchak Cohen of the Ayelet Hashachar organization arranged the wedding ceremony under the chuppah. One of the most moving moments, Elad said, was when their family friend Avida Becher recited one of the blessings under the chuppah. Avida, who fought heroically on October 7 to protect the kibbutz, tragically lost his wife and son, and also his leg.
Amid this moving, joyous ceremony, those present did not forget their brothers and sisters, and a special prayer was recited for the captives, the wounded, the IDF soldiers, and all of Israel.
Elad told all his well-wishers, “We did not come to Be’eri just to get married. We are returning to Be’eri to live! We will raise our children here not only for the sake of the community but also for ourselves.”
Translated by Yehoshua Siskin, Janine Muller SherrWant to read more by Sivan Rahav Meir? Visit sivanrahavmeir.com.