Embarrassed to be an Israeli; embarrassed to be a Jew.
Just a year ago, when Israel and the Jewish people were at the forefront of saving lives in Ukraine – I was proud of my heritage. But the current political discourse has made me ashamed of our leaders, rabbis and politicians.
I’m just a journalist who is supposed to be delivering the news, based on facts and data, yet I keep on finding myself trying to mediate. As a journalist, I have access to people in high places and at times, not very often, but occasionally, they will listen to what I have to say, as a worried Israeli citizen and as a worried Jew.
There was the Israeli minister who told me, not for attribution, that he wouldn’t meet a Reform or Conservative rabbi when he visits the US. I was outraged when he confided in me and asked for this piece of information to be off the record. “If a head of a Jewish Federation is Reform, I’ll meet him, but not with the streams and not with their rabbis,” he said. I went home after that meeting with a stomach ache.
“If a head of a Jewish Federation is Reform, I’ll meet him, but not with the streams and not with their rabbis.”
An Israeli minister (off the record)
I texted him that evening, “I haven’t been able to calm down since our conversation,” I wrote. “I Just think that unconditional love should be our supreme value. If an Israeli leader decides not to talk to another Jew - this is a crime, in my humble opinion. Meet with them, without cameras and press releases. Just talk. Just listen. Try and understand where they are coming from.”
This minister was actually open to dialogue. “Please teach me. I don’t know enough. I never met a Reform Jew. Maybe I'll change my mind and maybe the opposite will happen. Who knows?”
Yet at the same time, boycotting has become our nation's most popular sport: Left-wing Jewish organizations have been calling for a boycott of Israeli leaders for years, but now many in the mainstream Jewish organizational world have adopted this terrible habit. When the Conference of Presidents, one of US Jewry’s umbrella organizations, visited Israel a few weeks ago, they wouldn’t meet with Israeli leaders from the Religious Zionist Party (RZP) block, as well as with the haredi (ultra-Orthodox) ministers in this government. They didn’t make a fuss about it, they just ignored the existence of five parties in the six-party coalition in Israel.
They ignored the Israeli leaders that are causing most of what they see as problematic, or moving Israel in the direction of a “non-democratic country.” How can you influence anyone or anything if you don’t meet with them?
A year ago, now Finance Minister Bezalel Smotrich visited the UK and was called by the Board of Deputies, UK Jewry’s umbrella organization to “Get back on the plane, Bezalel, and be remembered as a disgrace forever,” the board said in a tweet.
In a second tweet in Hebrew, the board noted his past statements against Arabs and the LGBT community, and said it rejected Smotrich’s “disgusting ideology that promotes hatred.”
On Thursday, Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu will be visiting the UK, but he has no plans to meet with Anglo Jewry. UK Jews, at least those who aren’t in the ultra-orthodox community, have serious problems with this government. They may have wanted to meet him, but they also aren’t devastated that the head of the Jewish state won’t meet the Jewish community when he visits the Kingdom – as most heads of the country would normally do in these types of visits? Isn’t this a problem? Shouldn’t this have been his first stop after landing in the UK?
I’m embarrassed that our elected officials are blabbering and speaking nonsense about too many topics, issues and countries. One minister says she doesn't really like Dubai, because of reports of downgrading diplomatic relations with the UAE, our newest ally and strategic partner against Iran's nuclear weapons. I’m embarrassed that our ministers and their staff don’t speak English. I’m embarrassed that many Israeli ministers visited the US and France, but haven’t met their counterparts in these countries since they are being boycotted, even if temporarily.
I’m embarrassed that our opposition won’t move their egos aside and agree to dialogue. I’m unapologetic to Israelis who have been demonstrating for weeks but haven’t really read the texts explaining the suggested judicial reforms.
I’m embarrassed to live in a country with a majority of Mizrahi Jews with only one representative in the Supreme Court. I’m embarrassed to live in a Jewish state where a huge group of secular Israelis doesn’t know anything about Judaism, many of them also see our shared heritage as hostile and negative. I’m embarrassed to watch an interview with a former chief justice that said he “knows barely anything” about Judaism and Jewish law, even though he thinks he will be able to keep Israel as a Jewish and Democratic state.
I’m embarrassed by our MKs who introduce laws that cause a majority of Israelis to hate Judaism, instead of embracing it.
I want to disappear when I hear how Israeli leaders speak about our government and claim that we live in a dictatorship. I’m embarrassed by Israelis who think they are worth more than others just because they make a higher salary. They can threaten to leave Israel and take their businesses with them, but they have no idea what it is like to live as a minority and as an immigrant. Israel may have its problems, but the real struggle should be changing it from within.
I’m embarrassed by Israelis who decided to not show up for their army or reserve service as a protest against the government.
On the other hand, I also get it.
I understand why there are those Israelis who feel as if the Israel they once knew is changing and becoming something they don’t identify with.
I understand why there are those Israelis who feel as if they have never received all of the rights they should have, as well as representation in all types of leadership in Israel.
I get it.
I understand the Jews in the Diaspora that need to somehow keep on defending Israel even though many MK’s and ministers curse them or see them as the devil since they aren’t orthodox or politically aligned with them.
I understand the Israeli who never visited a Jewish community outside of Israel and doesn't understand why this group of Jews who don’t even speak their language think they should influence what's going on here.
I understand the right-wing voters that finally feel as if they can fulfill their wildest dreams since they are in power and want to make a difference.
I’m also very much afraid.
I’m afraid that this disconnect between groups, whether internally or externally will cause damage that will take decades to repair. Afraid that dialogue between Israeli leaders and Diaspora leaders will be narrow and specific, without a connection to a majority of Jews outside of Israel.
I’m afraid that secular Israelis will hate Judaism even more, instead of seeing the beauty that our heritage has to offer.
My solution isn’t genius or creative, it's simple. Just get into a room (whether physically or virtually), listen and talk. If we don’t listen to the other side; if we don’t try and understand the situation they’re in – we won’t be able to really connect. Listen and talk. Even if it takes hours or days. This is the only way we can continue to survive as a nation.
Let’s just all try to be mensches; people; human beings. Therefore, you can skip sending me a press release about your meetings, dramatic as they may be. Sometimes in order to make real changes, you need to keep quiet.
Please, I beg of you, just start creating a dialogue with someone that thinks very differently than you – it's amazing what just a simple conversation can do. Trust me.